A Big, Fat Tanzanian Wedding

On Saturday I had the privilege of going to a traditional Tanzanian wedding!  Pascal, the assistant director at Save Africa, got married and wanted us to be there to share in his happiness as well as snap a million pictures of everything that happened throughout the celebrations. Matt and I went to the wedding along with two other volunteers who worked at Save Africa before we arrived.

As part of the Tanzanian tradition, the bride’s family has what is called a “send off” a few days or a few weeks before the wedding.  This is basically a party they throw to say farewell to their daughter and give their final approval to the groom.  While we did not attend the send off, we were told it is usually a very emotional party as the bride is officially being given away to the groom’s family.

Pascal walking towards his bride :)

After the send off takes place, they have a typical church ceremony followed by a reception (both of which we were able to attend).  The church ceremony was in Swahili so it was a little difficult to follow exactly what was being said but it seemed to be more or less like a traditional wedding in America. One difference that was interesting was the processions down the aisle.  First the groom walks in with his father and ring bearer and they are followed by a group of family members who are dancing and singing like crazy.  Once he gets to the alter, he waits with his back turned until the bride has started to walk in with her mother, maid of honor, and flower girl (also followed in by dancing and singing family members). After the bride has entered the church, the groom turns around and starts to slowly walk towards her with his father and ring bearer.  When he has reached her, the families join, he lifts her veil, and the families walk together down the aisle…still dancing and singing.  There was a whole lot of fun African music and dancing during the ceremony while they said their vows and signed the marriage certificate.

Dancing family members 

After the ceremony, the bride, groom and close family members went to take pictures at a beautiful game reserve down the road with tons of animals. Since I was hired as Pascal’s photography, us white folk were also allowed to go take pictures with them.  I felt a little out of place since we were obviously not close family but Pascal specifically requested our presence!  His wife is beautiful and I loved following them around and documenting the day.

Once pictures were taken, we drove to the reception where the rest of the guests were waiting.  The reception was coincidentally being held in a hall at the school I am sending Edwin and Augustino to so it was cool to see the transformation from school to wedding venue.  The color theme of the reception was red, white, and blue. When we first arrived I felt as if I had walked straight into a huge 4^th of July party in the late 80s/early 90s.  The decorations were a little over the top and very, very shiny.  It’s also kind of funny because the wedding was in a town called Usa River…USA, USA!

Anyyway, the wedding party waited outside while the guests were getting settled in their seats.  It was set up like a school play- folding chairs in rows facing a stage where the bride and groom stood all night.  The mother of the bride and father of the groom were the first to dance down the aisle, again followed by an entourage of crazy family members and close friends.  Once they reached the front, the bride and groom danced down the aisle to really fun music.  I must say, their entrances really out did any wedding reception entrances I have seen at home!  The music alone just sends so much energy through the room and before you know it, everyone is out of their seats dancing, singing, and clapping.

A few speeches were given and then they cut the cake.  The bride and groom feed each other like any American wedding but then they also have their family members line up so they can feed them cake as well.  Because I was sitting in the front row to take pictures, I guess I was confused for a family member and forced to get up in front of everyone and be fed cake off a toothpick.  It was pretty embarrassing since I cannot katika, or shake my hips, nearly as well as the voluptuous African women! There was not enough cake for everyone so I felt preeeetty lucky to have received one of the few pieces.  After the cake, they set up a receiving line for gifts.  Again, family members and friends lined up in the back of the hall to deliver their gifts.  The loud music continued and with every gift that was given a huge procession of guests danced up and down the aisle passing the gifts over their heads and eventually into the hands of the bride and groom.  The bride and groom did share a first dance and there were a few other dance routines that their friends put on for everyone.  There wasn’t really much unorganized dance floor dancing like we have in America, though.  All of the dancing was done through the aisles when giving gifts and receiving cake.

The last thing we did was eat dinner…without any silverware.  We were shoveling rice, pasta, and vegetables into our mouths with our hands! So graceful.  Probably the biggest difference between a Tanzanian wedding and an American wedding was the lack of alcohol- there wasn’t any served all night!  The lack of alcohol didn’t really make any difference to me at all (except that I wasn’t able to ice myself…), but I did see it as a pretty strong symbol of how unimportant food and alcohol are in their lives.  They can’t afford to indulge in fancy food and drinks so they focus on the more important things like family, friends, and dancing!  Food and drinks are usually two of the most important things at any American wedding, followed by how good the DJ was. I think we sometimes lose site of what is truly important when it comes to weddings in America, we may have our priorities a little mixed up!  Pascal’s wedding was a beautiful reminder of what is really important when you celebrate the love between two people.